[幽默搞笑的英语口语对话]英语口语对话：卓别林和爱因斯坦间的搞笑英语对话meeting between einstein and chaplin卓别林和爱因斯坦间的搞笑英语对话爱因斯坦：what i admire most about your art is...+阅读

男： This seat empty？（这个座位是空的吧？）

来源于网络女：Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.（是的，如果你坐下，我的座位就是空的。）【我立马走人】

男：Haven''t I seen you some place before？（我好像以前在什么地方见过你？）

女：Yes. That''s why I don''t go there anymore.（是的。这就是为什么我不再去那个地方的原因。）【我不想和你有任何交集】

男：Will you go out with me this Saturday？（这个星期六你想跟我出去吗？）

女：Sorry. I''m having a headache this weekend.（抱歉。这个周末我头疼）【^_^头疼也是可以预约的】

男：Can I have your name？（我能知道你的名字吗？）

女：Why? Don''t you already have one？ （为什么？你不是已经有一个了吗？）

男：I''m a photographer. I''ve been looking for a face like yours.（我是摄影师。我一直在寻找一张像你这样的脸。）

女：I''m a plastic surgeon. I''ve been looking for a face like yours.（我是整形外科医生。我也一直在寻找一张像你这样的脸。）【长的真丑】

男：I think I could make you very happy.（我想我能让你非常快乐。）

女：Why? Are you leaving？（是吗？你是说你要离开？）【你能离开就是对我的仁慈】

英文幽默对话带翻译

A: Knock, knock.B: Who's there?A: OliveB: Olive who?A: Olive u and i don't care who knows it.Father buys a lie detector that makes a loud beep whenever somebody tells a lie. The son comes home in the afternoon. Father asks him, “So, you were at school today, right?”Son: “Yeah.”Detector: “Beep.“Son: “OK, OK, I was in a cinema.”Detector: “Beep.”Son: “Alright, I went for a beer with my friends.”Father: “What?! At your age, I wouldn't touch alcohol!“Detector: “Beep.”Mother laughs: “Ha ha ha, well, he really is your son!”Detector: “Beep.”...

英语幽默故事带翻译

After reading an article entitled 'Cigarette Smoking and Your Health' I lit a cigarette to calm my nerves. I smoked with concentration and pleasure as I was sure that this would be my last cigarette. For a whole week I did not smoke at all and during this time, my wife suffered terribly. I had all the usual symptoms of someone giving up smoking: a bad temper and an enormous appetite. My friends kept on offering me cigarettes and cigars. They made no effort to hide their amusement whenever I produced a sweets from my pocket. After seven days of this I went to a party. Everybody around me was smoking and I felt extremely uncomfortable. When my old friend Brian urged me to accept a cigarette, it was more than I could bear.I took one guiltily, lit it and smoked with satisfaction. My wife was delighted that things had returned to normal once more. Anyway, as Brian pointed out, it is the easiest thing in the world to give up smoking. He himself has done it lots of times!

参考译文

读完一篇题为《吸烟与健康》的文章之后，我点上了一枝香烟，来镇定一下自己紧张的神经。我聚精会神而又愉快地吸着这枝烟。因为我确信这是我最后一枝烟了。整整一个星期我根本没有吸烟。在此期间，我妻子吃尽了苦头。我具备了戒烟者通常表现出来的所有症状：脾气暴躁和食欲旺盛。我的朋友们不断地向我递香烟和雪茄。每当我从口袋里掏出一包糖果时，他们都毫不掩饰地表现出他们对此感到非常好笑。这样过了7天以后，我去参加一次聚会。我周围的每个人都在吸烟，我感到非常不自在。当我的老朋友布赖恩极力劝我接受一枝香烟时，我再也忍不住了。我内疚地接过一枝点上，心满意足地抽起来。一切又都恢复了正常，为此我妻子十分高兴。不管怎么说，正如布赖恩指出的那样，戒烟是世界上最容易的事情，他自己就已戒了很多次了！

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