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我想知道一些英语笑话短一点简单一点就可以了谢谢

02月07日 编辑 39baobao.com

[医学英语文章翻译]数百万的英国人的想象'food intolerances网络诊断后 有300万英国人患有“虚构”的食品intolerances,根据研究人员指出。高达12亿自称是宽容,食物从牛奶芥末——但只有不到1 /...+阅读

ONLY A FEW WORDS

At a court the judge is interrogating a mugger but gets into difficulty because the mugger is a foreigner who doesn't speak English. "Don't you speak English at all?" the judge asks. "Only a few words," replies the mugger.

"What words do you know?"

"Your purse or your life!"

DON'T BE SELFISH

A mother is admonishing her son.

----Now, John, don't be selfish. Let your little brother share the bicycle with you.

----But Mother, I do. I ride it down the hill, and he rides it up the hill.

Tom's excuse

Teacher: Tom, why are you late for school every day?

Tom: Every time I come to the corner, a sign says, "School-Go Slow".

Bad news and very bad news

Doctor: I have some bad news and some very bad news.

Patient: Well, might as well give me the bad news first.

Doctor: The lab called with your test results. They said you have 24 hours to live.

Patient: 24 HOURS! That's terrible!! WHAT could be WORSE? What's the very bad news?

Doctor: I've been trying to reach you since yesterday.

MONEY AND FRIENDS

A: Which do you find more important, money or friends?

B: Friends, of course.

A: Why?

B: I can always borrow money from friends.

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